What To Do When He Loses Interest
What To Do When He Loses Interest
When he loses interest you might have a problem. I would be discussing how to handle a situation whereby a man that was interested in you suddenly loses interest and leaves.
This happens very often, it is not a strange occurrence. I would share my own story and also state what to do when he loses interest.
What To Do When He Loses Interest
I dealt with this the feminine way, which I am convinced is the proper way, I would urge every lady out there to learn about their feminine energy and also know how to use it in constructive ways. There are a lot of ways to put the feminine energy to use but our focus today would be on what to do when he loses interest.
Most women, particularly driven and ambitious women don't know a lot about the feminine energy, how substantial it is and how it can help you find a solution to certain things like what to do when he loses interest. Some women don't even realize they need to know what to do when he loses interest.
To know more about your feminine energy, you can check out some feminine books or take a feminine test. Having apt knowledge about feminine energy could make you discover how attractive you are to men.
Not knowing what to do when he loses interest can be annoying
Therefore I would be using my personal experience to explain how this should be handled. In the earlier years when I was still young, and vibrant, enjoying the single life and appreciating the simplicity of the world.
One day, on a regular sunny afternoon, I met this young man and at that instant, I knew I felt something I have not felt before. They felt like butterflies in my stomach or an explosive firebomb in my head whatever you might call it, all I knew was that I was fascinated by this man.
We had a lot of mutual interest, truthfully, at the time I wouldn't have thought I would write an article about what to do when he loses interest but here we are. I was into arts then and he was also an artist, so we had a bond. I could feel a connection that could be related to that of romantic emotions between us.
What happened with me when I see he loses interest
As I felt all of this excitement, of which I am used to, I noticed a certain change in my behaviour at that moment I knew this was trouble. It's normal that when we feel a certain kind of likeness or attraction to someone, there could be a sudden obvious change in our behavioural patterns. We don't think as logically as we naturally would, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
So back to my story, we met, there were emotions and I was pretty confident that he would be the one because the attraction felt mutual and he seemed like he was interested in me too. Our first meeting point was so passionate and it ended with a kiss. After that day I was so optimistic, I thought I knew how this love story would end, and the end was not on a lesson on what to do when he loses interest. After that first encounter, he didn't reach out, no phone calls, not even a text message.
I became sad and worried, and I began to make excuses for him. For a connection I was so positive about, I didn't expect such silence for this long, so I reached out to him. After reaching out, I began to stage occurrences where I could see him and in turn have a moment with him. It was well orchestrated and we ended up “bumping into” each other weekly.
How we used to live
We spent time together, joked, laughed, had amazing conversations, enjoying his company basically, that was the kind of relationship we had. Everything was coming along well, but it still seemed forced. He wasn't in on the chase. After a while of deluding myself, I decided to ask what we were doing and he told me he wasn't interested in a relationship.
He was sincere, I discovered that pushing further might mean pushing him away. He wasn't saying much about the whole relationship thing so I couldn't know what was going on in his head. I was so positive about it, that I had it all planned out but unfortunately there was no plan on what to do when he loses interest.
At this point I was craving his attention, I wanted to always be around him. I wasn't keen on diving into a conversation that was associated with relationships. I wasn't so sure of what the outcome would be and what to do when he loses interest. I also tried to avoid being in a romantic situation with him, because we were not dating and it seemed inappropriate.
Note that, what to do when he loses interest should be known even before you choose to start your healing process.
It starts the moment you notice he is not interested in the relationship. I began to give him space, if he didn't reach out, which was normal for him not to, I didn't reach out too. No messages from him, no messages from me too. I didn't make excuses for him being distant anymore, I didn't question my stance, I told myself “if he wants to see me he knows where to reach me”.
I stopped being curious about his whereabouts during the times he stayed away, I did not push to know what was going on, at the time I didn't know this was what to do when he loses interest, but I did it anyway because I felt that's what's best. I began to be feminine; I was unlocking my “feminine energy” unconsciously.
Demanding answers from him, wanting to know why he has not reached out, called or sent messages, those are a part of the masculine energy. Are you anxious? Are you uncomfortable? All these questions should not be coming from you as they are signs of the masculine way, being that inquisitive would make you come off as needy.
And finally this is the only way what you can do when he loses interest
I stopped going after him even though I wanted to, I took a few steps back to watch what he was going to do, was he going to reach out or not. If he decided not to, I was not going to go after him. I gave him space.
I know you would be thinking that I created all the other dates to see him. Yes, I did, for some reasons and the scenario is different now. I thought he was merely holding back at the beginning; I did not know he wasn't interested in a relationship. And besides, I never asked him directly to hang out with me. But now I have stopped the orchestration too, I have stopped pursuing him.
Feminine energy also makes ways in which the female gender goes about spending time with an individual or making a person want to spend time with them. This can be fairly different from what men do. It can be a little manipulative other than the regular do you want to hang out. I was going in from a different perspective, I created situations whereby people were meant to come around, then gave him a random invite like I give others and probably insists that he comes.
I wasn't direct with asking him to come around, even though most times he does and is also always the only that shows up. I would stage this incident so smoothly and pretend to be naive about the fact that only he showed up. It would be just him and I and we already had a way we went about these episodes and the things we do at such times.
That's the feminine way. And I also felt that coming out plain with what I want and demanding more would be outright hostile or let's say assertive, and I was scared of whatever the outcome of that would be. So I didn't do that, I let him be.
Days would turn into weeks sometimes weeks turn into months and we wouldn't talk, communicate or know of each other's whereabouts. And this was because I stopped trying to initiate happenings between us. I stopped the chase totally and I was riding on my feminine energy.
After months went by without talking, after he had properly portrayed that he wasn't interested in a relationship, I had made up my mind not to stage those events again. At these events, we would meet, eat, drink, talk and just enjoy each other's company.
You can read article about his secret obsession here.
And there is more
I discovered I was getting attached to him, I couldn't get him out of my head, I kept thinking of him and his current situations, I missed him and I was getting jealous about the fact that he would be spending time with others but I had to stay away because that’s what to do when he loses interest.
At this point, I wasn't resisting what I feel, if it was resentment if it was jealousy if it was the anger I let it all out because that's what to do when he loses interest. I let all emotions take over but I resisted the urge to reach out to him. I let the negative emotions dominate and I let it sink that this is what to do when he loses interest.
Because I let the emotion out, after a few months that seemed way longer than it was, I was over him. I stopped feeling any strong emotions towards him.
All I felt was indifference, no strong feeling of love or hate nothing.
I was over him in like three months after letting my emotions take over. I understood he wasn't interested or making attempts to check on me and I didn't care anymore. It felt really good. I still thought of him, but just randomly nothing intense. He didn't affect me anymore. His effect on me was gone.
Truthfully, it was tough. Those months felt longer, it is really hard to restrict yourself from doing what your heart wants without suppressing the feeling. Letting out your emotions and still not letting these emotions take over your actions, it was really difficult, but that's what to do when he loses interest.
Now that I think back to those times, I am realizing that it was even harder than when I broke up a four years-long relationship. It was hard on me even though we never dated, it wasn't easy to know he lost interest without even giving it a shot.
What we had could have been considered a fling but I was already so emotionally connected, I was so hopeful never thought I would need to know what to do when he loses interest. I had just gotten over the four-year relationship breakup a year ago.
So you can call me a breakup expert. I knew the processes to follow, I let the emotion out, resisted the urge to reach out, be clingy or snappy and now I am over him. This time it was quicker because I knew how to go about it. Anytime he crossed my mind it is just the regular way I remembered anyone, there was no surge of emotions. I was over him emotionally and that was the greatest part of it all.
It takes some ladies more time to get over these feelings, it takes some of them half a year, some a year and sometimes even longer. Some just create distractions instead of finding out what to do when he loses interest and take these steps.
You have to make sure you let those emotions out and get over them because sometimes the distraction you created may fade away and the emotions would come back stronger when you think about him. So it's best when he loses interest, you take steps to lose interest too. You must let these emotions out so they'd be processed properly as that's what to do when he loses interest.
The best thing you can do when he loses interest is to not force it. Let him come to you or let him go. You have to let your feminine out and acknowledge your feminine energy. I was truthful to myself, I wasn't telling myself lies or making excuses for him anymore.
I didn't pretend like everything was fine. He was never putting in any effort and he already stated clearly that he is not interested in a relationship, so I told myself the truth. It's either he didn't want this or wanted it without the commitment. And he chose already by not reaching out or making any effort. Always remain true to yourself.
I was putting in the effort 80% of the time, he and nature were still sharing the remaining 20% of effort he was supposedly putting in. The moment I stopped instigating stuff everything stopped. He never tried and it still felt like he was doing me a favour. Another reason I was able to get over him fast was that I did the feminine thing, I stopped trying too hard. I did the feminine thing and it helped me.
Some people might disagree and say you should try using your masculine because he wants you to try harder, no stop, you shouldn't, a man goes after what he wants. if he is not interested, no amount is attempting or initiating that can change that, you would just come off as clingy.
Whether you approach the situation as a masculine or feminine, what you do when he loses interest is not trying to reverse it. Being in your masculine can mean trying too hard and it's most likely going to push the man away and then you'd blame yourself. You find yourself questioning your every move, you would be in the midst of a lot of should-haves and shouldn't have. So you should stay away from this.
What to do when he loses interest, is heal.
Not distract yourself, you need to heal. In the healing process, you might find some fun things to do but you still need to let those emotions out, make sure you do not distract yourself from them. You would know distractions when you see them, and two of the greatest distractions could be alcohol and hanging out with other men. Don't do that it would hurt you more.
When using either your feminine or masculine, be careful of what you do in order not to hurt yourself. That's why you are advised to use your feminine to avoid blaming yourself. Do things that you can gain from on the long run, learn self-appreciation and ensure to come out a better person than you were before. This is what to do when he loses interest.
If you are man, you can read my article about I miss my girlfriend topic.
